Thursday, November 24, 2011

Grateful


I believe that true gratitude is a humbling experience. I also believe we are often not truly grateful for what we have until something reminds us that we should be. And that something is usually terrible.

We are not grateful for our families until someone we love loses someone they love.

We are not grateful for our health until someone close to us falls ill.

We are not grateful for our jobs until someone we know loses theirs and struggles to get back on their feet.

And sometimes loss hits closer to home, and we’re not grateful until it’s too late.

I admit that I’m guilty of this. Yesterday, I saw a woman walking down the sidewalk. Scoliosis had curved her back so severely and hunched her over so far, I wondered how she could see where she was going. Every step looked painful. My hand flew to my heart and tears blurred my vision. It never really occurred to me to be grateful for my health, and I was humbled with gratitude. I thanked the Lord for my health and that of my family. I prayed that the woman had someone to help take care of her and that she was walking alone that morning by choice.

And I’m not a religious person. At all.

It’s a shame that suffering and loss are so often required before we are grateful for what we have.

I'm grateful for our nice, cozy home and the small luxuries and comforts we can afford. I would take all these things for granted, except I grew up without so much. Sometimes it takes poverty to appreciate wealth.  

I’m so appreciative of my loving husband, but I’m doubly grateful for him because I once felt the heartbreak of a loveless marriage and the painful defeat of divorce.

I am fall-to-my-knees grateful for my baby boy who is happy and healthy, especially because we know others who have not been so lucky. I can think of nothing more devastating than to lose a child or to live every day being afraid that you will.

Perhaps motherhood has made me more morbid, but everything feels… heavier… now that I’m a mom. Seeing that woman on the sidewalk would've made me sad before Quinn was born, but the sight of her wouldn’t have caused me to immediately stop and pray like it did yesterday.

I’m extra thankful our nice, warm home and small luxuries because I know Quinn will grow up with comforts I didn’t have and without the worries that I did have.

I appreciated my super awesome Hubs before we had a son, but now that he’s the father of my child, my heart is heavy with love and gratitude for this man. Quinn and I are so lucky to have him.

I always knew that children were a blessing, but now that I have a child of my own, I can’t imagine a day without him. Hubs and I are so lucky to have such a happy, healthy baby. There are no words to describe how I feel about this little boy.

On this Thanksgiving Day, I am humbled with gratitude. While delicious food warms our kitchens and our bellies today, as we are surrounded by our loved ones, let us be filled with gratitude and the beginning of holiday cheer.



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