Thursday, June 27, 2013

And then somehow a raccoon got involved…. Yeah, I don’t know....


So the day has come. I have an Emmett. You remember Emmett, right? That four year-old boy at the park that made my brain explode with his non-stop, stream of consciousness chatter? Quinn is quickly becoming an Emmett. He just turned two in March, and already he could talk Emmett under the table.

Quinn would make Emmett’s mother’s brain explode.

The upside of having a chatterbox child that rarely pauses to take a breath is that he’s often quite funny. Here are a few examples.  


Stewie from The Family Guy could take a lesson from Quinn on how to get Mommy’s attention.

QUINN: Mommy! Come look at my truck!
MOMMY: I’m almost done making dinner, Q-ball. I’ll come look in just a minute.
QUINN:  Mommy! Come look at my truck!
MOMMY: Just a minute, Quinn. Please wait.
QUINN: Mommy! Come look at my truck!
MOMMY: (nothing)
QUINN: Mommy!
MOMMY: (still nothing)
QUINN: MA!!!
MOMMY: (still nothing… but trying not to laugh)
QUINN: (singing my name to the tune of “Frère Jacques” (or “Are You Sleeping?) )
Ma. Ma. Ma. Ma.
Ma. Ma. Ma. Ma.
Ma-ma. Ma.
Ma-ma. Ma….
MOMMY: (cracking up now) Okay, Quinn. You have Mommy’s attention. Show me your truck.

Gotta give the kid credit for ingenuity.


My favorite is Quinn’s endless “must fill the silence with small talk” chatter. This conversation occurs 427 times a day.

QUINN: Mommy, how was your day?
MOMMY: My day was great, Q. Thanks for asking. How was your day?
QUINN: My day is on Friday.
MOMMY: Friday is a great day.
       (A few minutes later)
QUINN: Mommy, how was your day?
MOMMY: Just wonderful, Q. How was your day?
QUINN: My day is on Thursday now.
MOMMY: Thanks for the update, kiddo.
       (A few minutes later)
QUINN: Mommy, how was your day?
MOMMY: (closes eyes and takes a breath) My day was great, Quinn. How was yours?
QUINN: My day was just perfect, Mama.
MOMMY: Glad to hear it, love.

I’ll have that conversation a 428th time if it means ending a sweet note like that.


Quinn wants to know how everything works, including caterpillars. After telling him how caterpillars work several times in a row, I asked him to tell me how they work. His explanation went like this.

QUINN: A caterpillar turns into a butterfly.
MOMMY: That’s right. How does it turn into a butterfly?
QUINN: It goes into a raccoon!
MOMMY: (laughing out loud) I think you mean “cocoon,” sweetie.
QUINN: No, it’s a raccoon.

I wonder how the raccoon feels about that.